Category: find a way

LIVING LA VIDA LOCA….SEVEN DAYS OF EATING LAVENDER, DAY THREE (LAVENDER CAKE)

I can still hear my wonderful father saying to me time and time again in my head: “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.” That was him, “King of the Colloquial Expression”, always finding a teachable moment everywhere. A man of few words but words that meant something. He didn’t speak much, of course, unless he had something to say. No idle banter for him, but a pleasant and funny disposition, a kind and loving heart, a warm smile with a sunny laugh, and a man of few words. Life lived well and lived fully.

I think of my Dad today on day three of a week of lavender recipes I am trying. It comes down to the idea of cut the idea of cutting your losses while you are ahead versus you never know until you try. Go the distance; live without wondering what could have happened. Go the distance; risk disappointment but know you tried. I impart these same words to my daughter, “Teen Traveler” and decide without blinking an eye that the proverbial “show must go on”, another quip from my beautiful days with my father before he passed on. Even though we haven’t really cared for the two lavender recipes we tried this week, we will continue in our quest.

Day Three: Lavender pound cake. Pound cake brings to mind simpler, almost more old-fashioned times, as my beautiful mother adored pound cake and served it to me when I was small like her mother did before her. Pound cake, buttery goodness and sweet confection, just like Mom. Throw in a little lavender, and it HAS to be good, right? This time I am going to decrease the amount of lavender I use to see if that makes a difference and pair it with lemon. How could lemon pound cake go wrong with wise words of advice from my father coupled with sweet memories of my mother……

I decided to use my Mother’s old vintage Corningware loaf pan, complete with the cornflower from a lifetime ago filled with less complication, confusion and without Covid. This was either a very good thing to use my Mother’s pan as fond memories of love and comfort surrounded me while I was baking, or…..it was a bad thing because my mother wasn’t much of a baker. In either case, it was fun to take out my Mother’s old pan again if for nothing other than the sake of nostalgia.

Yesterday my track record for yummy lavender recipes was 0 for 2. I waited with excitement as I watched the cake come out of the oven and cool. I used a vanilla confectionary sugar glaze when it was cool enough as the recipe directed.

And I added sprinkles. Of COURSE I added sprinkles, as I had learned years ago from marrying into my husband’s family that sprinkles on our Italian struffali is the ONLY way to go. LOTS and LOTS of sprinkles. My daughter also taught me that life is better, always better, with a little sprinkles on top.

One person who tasted it said it felt like they were eating a scented drawer liner. My daughter said it would be delicious WITHOUT the lavender. I actually liked it, but I would have preferred the recipe to have a little heavier glaze on the top, as it was almost transparent in the recipe, even though I added even more confectionary sugar to thicken it than the recipe called for.

Day three: 1 for 3. Finally a recipe that tastes good (to some of us). I actually think I’m on to something here with the combination of lavender and lemon. Perhaps tomorrow I will try lavender lemonade. You know how it goes…..”if life gives us lemons, we make lemonade!”

Life is good; carpe diem, friends……..

(photo 1:dreamstime)

SOMETIMES A FISH IS JUST A FISH

Inspired by the frogs and tadpoles we saw recently at Rainbow Springs State Park in Dunnellon, FL, my daughter, “Teen Traveler” decided she HAD to raise tadpoles. She and her friend went scouting for a location to find tadpoles over a week’s time whenever they went for a walk in the neighborhood. One day, she came back so excited that she had found a source nearby for the coveted tadpole. Armed with a net, a bucket, and a huge sense of adventure, she set out to catch three tadpoles to raise in our home. I admired her preparation. She had researched how many tadpoles she could safely raise in our home and announced that frogs should be raised with at least two other “friends.” She decided that she would use a ten gallon fish tank and that three would be the appropriate number for her. She took the tadpoles back to our home, “dripping” them (a procedure she uses to slowly acclimate the new fish she purchases to the new water in her fresh water aquarium) to ensure their safety.

She has been taking care of them for a few weeks now, and they are no longer the size of a pin head (okay, yes, I exaggerate). Just the other day, she announced with both surprise and disappointment that the tadpoles are not really tadpoles. Evidently the tadpoles she took home were really fish. After she announced this, we laughed for quite a while. Sometimes a fish is just a fish, I guess. It amazes me is that the discovery of what they were in no way diminished her sense of excitement she felt when she found them, nor did the discovery reduce her fond memories of the time she spent with her friend searching and searching for them. At the end of the day, it is a good story in her mind or at least a good “ice breaker” if she’s ever at a party.

While recently at Rockledge Garden Center in Rockledge, FL looking for host plants for our butterflies (okay, looking for butterfly eggs AND caterpillars, too) she found some tadpoles mixed in among a tank of various water lilies that were for sale.

Before I knew it, she asked an employee if the tadpoles were for sale and ended up with three tadpoles that the employee gave her, no doubt admiring her confidence, poise, and drive.

photo of frog life cycle courtesy of Encyclopedia Britannica on-line

Sometimes a fish is just a fish, but attaining your goal feels even better. Doing what we set out to do, despite whatever setbacks we encounter, is really the “name of the game.” Disappointment is everywhere during our lifetime. Learning to face disappointment, deal with it, continue with our plans, and laugh at our follies is the important thing. Learning to laugh at ourselves when we make a mistake is a gift my mother taught me long ago. Laugh and move on.

Life is good; carpe diem, friends…………..

frog/lily photo: dreamstime

WAY over my head…….

sulphur butterfly raised from a caterpillar found in my neighborhood on the sidewalk

Somehow the lyrics to a pop song flashed in my head as I looked at the end table in my family room the other day:

“Am I out of my head?
Am I out of my mind?….

…Don’t think that I can explain it
What can I say, it’s complicated….”

-“Bad Things” by Camilla Cabello and Machine Gun Kelly

What started out as a simple way to pass the time during the “shelter at home” pandemic lock-down has turned crazy. Simply CRAZY! I looked at my daughter, “Teen Traveler,” while we were out on one of our day trips the other day and said with a laugh, “We are in WAY over our heads!” We traveled to a garden center an hour away to purchase some organic parsley to feed our caterpillars and laughed when we heard that they were fresh out of parsley because some woman bought TWENTY parsley plants shortly before our arrival. We laughed together the whole ride back to our house wondering WHO would buy TWENTY parsley plants.

Fast forward to us taking inventory while feeding our caterpillars later in the day, and we decided that soon WE will need twenty parley plants for our black swallowtail butterflies that are currently in the caterpillar stage. We didn’t PLAN for that many caterpillars. Honestly. It seems that whenever we went for a walk, we took a cup with a lid “just in CASE” we found any butterfly eggs or caterpillars. Then, it didn’t help that when we went to the garden center we saw some caterpillars on some of the plants, and we asked if we could take one (or two or three…)home to raise. It didn’t help that when we purchased parsley from the garden center, most times we found a few eggs or a few tiny caterpillars on the plant AFTER we got home, either.

I am on the clean and tidy side, so if you EVER told me I would have many, I mean MANY, caterpillars in my house I would have said no. Then again, when I was pregnant many years ago if you told me I would have everything I could possibly need, including the proverbial kitchen sink, in my diaper bag, I would have thought you were crazy, too! I have decided having the caterpillar eggs and tiny caterpillars inside my house is the best place to keep them, though. I tell myself that it’s okay (while I inhale and exhale deeply, I might add) because they are in a cup with a napkin over the top, secured with an elastic. There is a lid to the cup over that which has tiny air holes poked on it for air circulation. I am so good with the idea of a double barrier. Nothing goes into or out of that cup without my knowledge. The eggs, caterpillars, and plants don’t smell bad I tell myself as I inhale and exhale deeply. Has to be done, as keeping the caterpillars and eggs in a cup outside in this Florida heat is much like a sauna, and they would die. I read on-line that some crazy butterfly person lets the butterfly caterpillars roam freely inside her house and often finds the chrysalises attached to her drapes! I laughed when I told my daughter and husband at least I am NOT that person. At least not yet and hoping not ever!

tiny white butterfly egg on our milkweed plant outside in a container garden

Once the caterpillars get a little larger (after the first and second “instar” or stage, maybe after a week) my daughter and I move them outside in butterfly cages. At least that WAS the plan until we realized we needed more cages than we thought. It was an exercise in creativity, as we had to come up with something quickly that would help, as we likely won’t have as many caterpillars growing at one time in the future. We came up with using some clear plastic plant saucers we found at Walmart with a lingerie bag (with TINY holes), which we supported upright with a host plant (MORE parsley) and dowels. This seems to be working well for the time being.

parsley in a lingerie bag for tiny caterpillars
larger black swallowtail caterpillar in a lingerie cage with larger holes (OUTSIDE the house)

The caterpillars don’t always excite me, as they can be a little creepy to be honest. Okay, sometimes they can be VERY creepy, but watching a butterfly emerge from its chrysalis to release into our yard is magical. The black swallowtail butterfly caterpillar, however, is beautiful in my opinion.

Last week, I found a sulphur caterpillar on my walk around the neighborhood right next to my foot. I took him home, put him in a cage, and just this week he hatched into a beautiful sulphur butterfly. Amazing. Amazing AND humbling. Last night I saw another caterpillar on my walk but left it where it was instead of taking it home this time, thinking we have a lot going on right now. A LOT going on! I’ll be on the look out for another gulf frittilary caterpillar next time I go walking, though. Make no mistake; this is a bit of an obsession I think….at least for the time being…but I like to think of it as a “diversion” from the pandemic right now though.

It’s funny how everyone is different. Someone in the family suggested that we keep a notebook of our findings. Another person in the family suggested we simply keep a list of all the butterflies we raise but acknowledged that some people just like the whimsy of it all instead. I am sort of in the middle. I keep a note on the cup of caterpillars with the date the egg hatched, the date the caterpillar went into the chrysalis, and the date it emerged from the chrysalis simply so I can plan ahead for parsley……more and more parsley. In the meantime, though, I have decided that this Easter Tiger Swallowtail butterfly (the only one we have) might do well with a floral water tube in a mini habitat with a cutting of the wild black cherry we have growing in the yard. That also keeps him from climbing around at the bottom of his tray with his frass (excrement) between cage cleanings, too. This way, I don’t need to put the whole host plant into the habitat until he gets larger, and the food will last longer because the plant needs full sun but the caterpillars do better out of the sun but in a bright spot. Plants can get “leggy” under these conditions.

Life is good. Find something that excites you every day. Find a reason to get out of the house to go for a walk (with a little scavenger hunt to find butterfly eggs and caterpillars, maybe?). Seems as though we never leave the house without a little cup and a lid these days.

Carpe diem, friends………..

COPING WITH SELF-ISOLATION AND THE PANDEMIC WITH AN ON-LINE BOOK CLUB

I am always of the mindset that if we don’t like whatever situation we are in, or if we can’t change the situation, we must change our thinking. Changing our thinking puts our life back into our own hands and allows us a choice as to how we proceed. Self- isolating was (and is still) difficult while we cope with the pandemic, so I began to think of all the wonderful ways I could connect with others beyond my narrow little world in the last few months. I really enjoy reading, so I found an on-line book club which met weekly during the pandemic. Although I didn’t love the books we read, it was such a welcome break to speak with others on-line about a shared experience. Talk centered around the book, but also drifted from time to time to how everyone was feeling about the pandemic. Talk continued also about what our experiences were like, which stores were opening, what restaurants were closed, etc…as the United States began to re-open in the last month or so.

The link below contains a small list of on-line book clubs for avid readers that want a shared experience or wish to try something new:

bookriot.com/2020/02/27/best-online-book-clubs-2020/

I have found it helpful in my life to exercise my body, to exercise my mind, and to exercise my soul regularly to stay healthy and well, and during this pandemic it was no different.

Life is good; try out something new today to help you cope with the trials and tribulations of the pandemic. That’s been the beauty of the pandemic, if there is any. That is, we all have found new ways to re-connect with others and to what we may have enjoyed in the past. Find a way to change your thinking and come up with a new diversion, too.

Carpe diem, friends……..

(If you belong to an on-line book club, feel free to message me, and I’ll post a link for others to hear about it, too.)

COPING WITH CORONA WITH A LITTLE GOLF AROUND THE HOUSE….”NOTHING IS MORE POWERFUL THAN THE HUMAN SPIRIT”

I have heard so very many interesting stories of how people are killing time during self-isolation, but this story of the human spirit is one that really inspires me. One of my best friends from college has been self-isolating with her family for quite some time now in a cold New England town. At least one grown child moved back home, a humbling situation because he has been unable to work because his job in the restaurant industry has been halted because of Covid-19. This is a very difficult period in time for most people around the globe, but my best friend, the Grateful Goddess, and her husband, Golf Guy, have found a way to instill laughter in their family. Just about two months after Grateful Goddess unexpectedly and suddenly lost her grandmother that she was extremely close to, she has found the resolve to keep moving forward, embodying the spirit of the old adage that “if life gives you lemons, you make lemonade.” This family makes gallons and gallons of lemonade at a time. The sound of laughter, the warm feeling of love, and the excitement of joy fill their rooms as they make happy memories at this difficult time and any other.

“Never underestimate the power of dreams and the influence of the human spirit. We are all the same in this notion: The potential for greatness lives within each of us.”

Wilma Rudolph

My friend, Grateful Goddess, has always been one of my most creative friends and one of the most kind-hearted people I’ve ever met. She’s always always there for me and for everyone else. I count her among my greatest blessings and have been honored to have her as my dear friend. She selflessly and joyfully gives and gives to those she loves. It’s no wonder that this matriarch of her family found a way to give some love and laughter to her family during these trying times. Her disposition is on the quiet side, but she has a playful gleam in her eyes when she is planning something fun, which is most often. She is known for having the most amazing parties with the most amazing games that she’s come up with to entertain her extended family and friends. I’m not exactly sure if she or her husband, Golf Guy, came up with a rousing game of mini golf INSIDE their New England home recently, but they all had lots of laughs as they played mini golf, moving from room to room within their home.

“The greatest achievement of the human spirit is to live up to one’s opportunities and make the most of one’s resources.”

Luc de Clapiers

Tee-off started with hole number one in the home office….this was serious business, as you can see from the face of concentration in the photo below.

Golf Guy is one of the coolest and calmest Dads around, always willing to lend a hand to his family in any way he can. Here he sets the rules for the game and offers support as well.


Hole number two was in the living room with Golf Guy keeping score meticulously, I’ll bet. He has an easy-going spirit, but I’m sure he was “in it to win it.”

Hole number three in the dining room with evidence of other fun activities, such as puzzles all around………..the competition escalates………..

I can just hear the laughter echoing off the walls for hole number four, which was also in the dining room but was a bit more challenging……by now, the whole family was also “in it to win it.”

Hole #4 – Teeing off in the family room, but the hole is in the kitchen, which is the adjacent room. Now this is getting REALLY challenging…………

Golf Guy is the picture of agility in mind and body as he makes the corner for hole number four in the kitchen………such concentration and determination……going for the win………

This is where it starts to get really crazy…………hole #5. Tee off is in on the front hall stairs, but the hole is in the mudroom! I am almost certain this was the brainchild of Grateful Goddess, shown below. I can see her now with the gleam in her eye, concentrating, but hearing a little restrained giggle escape her lips……she is intent on winning to be sure.

The golf ball makes the corner toward the mudroom…………the crowd was roaring…….I can hear the commentator now………….

FINALLY the golf ball lands in the mudroom, OVER the inverted waste basket with the cat making sure there are no cheaters. Can’t put ANYTHING past that cat!


Tee off for hole six off throws caution to the wind……..each golfer draws in a deep breath as the ball is hit from the TOP of the stairs into the basement below……..

Hole six in the basement is known as “The One With The Most Hazards”, the hole that separates the “men from the boys” and the girls from the women………


This hole in the basement requires the golf ball to travel through the carefully crafted red tunnel to…..

the final hole in the corner………….

Scores were tallied, breaths were held, giggles escaped from mouths………and….the…..winner…..is……………GRATEFUL GODDESS! A great day indoors in this safe haven, which is always filled with the welcoming scent of something wonderful cooking on the stove or in the oven. Pandemic or no pandemic, this incredible family finds a way to laugh and create happy memories and celebrates a full life together. Their spirit and joie-de-vivre shines through again and again and is an inspiration to all who know them.

Human spirit is the ability to face the uncertainty of the future with curiosity and optimism. It is the belief that problems can be solved, differences resolved. It is a type of confidence…..”

Bernard Beckett

“The darkest moments of our lives are not to be buried and forgotten, rather they are a meory to be called upon for inspiration to remind us of the unrelenting human spirit and our capacity to overcome the intolerable.”

Vince Lomardi

“Nothing is more powerful than the human spirit.”

Charlie Grant

Forget about the pandemic for a while, even if it is a short while. Find a creative way to cope with corona and fill your home with laughter and love. Transcend whatever prevents you from having a little fun or whimsy in your day today to create joy.

Life is good; carpe diem, friends…………

“We are all capable of living lives characterized by great joy. Within each of us is an amazing human spirit that is strong enough to overcome pain and disappointment. And no matter what our current situation happens to be, or what beliefs we may currently harbor about ourselves, we can tap into that inner strength and wisdom and move forward to create more joy.”

Salle Merrill Redfield

“If life gives you lemons, make lemonade” every single time….
ID 190334 © Tmcnem | Dreamstime.com

*golf ball photo courtesy of Dreamstime.com

INUKSHUK, A SYMBOL OF HOPE FOR TODAY AMONG THE COVID-19 PANDEMIC

Inuksuk with Aurora Borealis ID 131360289 © Cherylramalho | Dreamstime.com

Throughout the Arctic, in Northern Canada, Alaska and Greenland, there are many stone cairns dotted along the natural landscape called Inukshuk (or Inuksuk). For the Inuit people of the Arctic, these stone cairns served many purposes in ancient times. They were, in effect, some of the earliest “road signs,” alerting travelers which way to find food, a reference for travel routes, a message that someone had been there, a change in direction, where to find hunting areas, etc.

Inuksuk drawing ID 140415034 © Me7027 | Dreamstime.com

One type of Inukshuk, the Inunnguaq, is a human figure-shaped cairn of rocks. There are approximately one hundred of these human-shaped cairns over two thousand years old and are still standing at the Inuksuk National Historic Site on Fox Peninsula ( Baffin Island) in Canada. Some of these figures are six to seven feet tall, a formidable sight.

While these figures may have originally been a reference for travel routes, they remind us today of many things. These figures were carefully crafted of numerous rocks delicately balanced one on top of each other. Each rock supports and is supported by the rock above it and below it, and this balance reminds us of the need for balance in our own lives at this very moment, as we navigate through the new waters of this Covid pandemic. Each piece of the Inuskshuk is as important as the piece above and below it. These cairns have also been associated with hope and friendship as well.

The Inunnguaq reminds us today that we will find out way through this pandemic, no matter how long it takes us. The Inunnguaq also reminds us of the need for team work and the importance of community in this journey as well. May you never lose your path and may you always find your way home.

Life is good; carpe diem friends………